Video Tour #1

Check it out. Rather than rely on written rambling I thought I would try posting a short video of one of the places of (sort of) note in Pamplona. It is short as it is embarrassing talking to a camera in a public place, my voice being even camper and more tedious recorded than when just spoken. Nonetheless it gives a vague idea of what the place looks like. It's normally busier than this but it was siesta time and you know what that means.

love love love x

Must've Run All Day

I've been reading some soppy articles written by D-list celebrities, proof that I am indeed making the most of this experience. They are open letters to teachers who inspired them and whose lessons have stayed with them throughout the years. It was enough to melt even this heart of stone. These happen to correspond with mid year reports, not on my students but their evalution on me. You aren't allowed to be in the room when they do them, so not to influence them, so I have to go and stand in the corridor like a naughty child.

I won't know what they say for a little while, if I'm home in the next few weeks you know they don't like me. I really want to know, its like knowing someone is talking about you but they go quiet when you go anywhere near them. It has led me to evaulate myself in an attempt to predict what they might say. With lots of people thinking about being teachers at the moment I thought I would try to offer a few things I have learnt along the way.

*For English teachers especially spelling is important, especially when the word is incompetent, won't make that mistake again.

*Don't offer a child a pen that can also act as a torch, he was gone and now so is the pen

*Don't be learning the grammar as you yourself write it on the board, especially saying out loud something along the lines of 'ohhhh that makes sense'

*Its best to ignore the sexual side of a word. For example 'knob'

*They just won't be convinced to stop using the verb 'to party' but refuse to accept that there is such a verb as 'to Wikipedia'

*Think before you start examples, defining the word limp can lead you down some dark and dangerous paths, involving a hand gesture that you will never be allowed to forget

*With children giving out and more importantly taking away meaningless points is not a decision to be taken lightly, be prepared to live with consequences

*Try not to giggle when they mispronounce the word 'can't'

*The ones with a good level of English always think they are terrible while the ones with a bad level of English always think they are amazing

*You aren't there to defend the left side of the road or the packaged sandwich

*If they say they can swear in English take their word for it don't challenge them to, the results are... eye opening

*Be prepared to repeat yourself to the point of bordering on insanity

*They will make you doubt your grasp of English, if all else fails use the English teachers best friend "It just is that way" try not to follow it up with 'Ha!' or 'In your face!'

and most importantly, you will come to love them all, even the bastards.

I hope you are well, love love love x

The Outdoor Type

It feels like I have been away. The inital excitement of laying on my eyes on the big green monstrosity in which I live for the first time in three weeks has passed back into the routine. My teenagers are still lazy, the young ones are more interested in drawing something called a 'Farp' and the adults are still annoyed they aren't indulging in Oscar Wilde witticism. Everyone is in their right place, the Super BM metal hair shelf stacker is still stacking, the buildings janitor is still refusing to move above the lobby and the Chinese shop is still refusing to close ever for anyone or anything.

This week has been hard mostly because I didn't have time to plan much so I've been winging it. I've been learning the grammar along with them while trying to exude an air of iron clad authority. Read the grammar sheet, you start thinking ooohhh that makes sense, try to remember it all and transfer it to the board. The problem is when half way through an excerise you realise an exception and have to try and fit in without giving the game away. I have had more time so next week should be a lot better.

It's been good to see everyone. Cormac put my journey into perspective, he left Ireland on Friday and arrived in Pamplona on Monday at 3. This included a night sleeping at a bus station by batoned by a guard everytime he tried to sleep. Virtually everyone had travel problems except Marc and Kathryn who drive through France like a glamour 1950s couples without a care in the world.

Its been a quiet week but the strangest thing is that I have seen Pamplona's version of puppet man. That won't mean anything to people who didn't go to UEA, but there is a guy in Pamplona who blows a little toy trumpet while dancing with bells on his legs. He has with him a big of toy trumpets that you can buy from him. Like puppet man its curious and sad at the same time.

I have to go, Dan is cooking and has demanded our presence at 8.17, not a moment before and not a moment after.

all is quiet

love love love x

The Lowest Bitter

Greetings from a bitterly cold Bilbao. Remember when I said the Spanish went to war on the snow, well it ended like most Spanish wars, they were eventually overwhelmed. I'm supposed to be in Pamplona supping whiskey but the snow has led to all the roads being closed so I'm stuck here for the night.

My flight from Stansted was delayed. I began to make calculations about whether I was going to make the bus, I worked out that actually it would work perfectly as it would cut my waiting time and I'd comfortably make it. I hadn't taken into account that I was working on British time. I was calm and relaxed and reading the on flight magazine about reindeer farmers when they announced local time and I realised I was going to be lucky to make it. I rushed off the plane, got through passports, where the girl in front of me was physically sick, even ther bag collection was kind. I got to the bus, jumped on and it just sat there and sat there. I was five minutes late and the bus had gone. I thought this was a minor setback but the next one was in two and a half hours and was the last one. I got my ticket but it was cancelled.

Fortunately, Anna from school was due to be on the same bus so at least someone was here, her fluent Spanish has also been of great help. We even made some friends, a Japanese girl whose name I can't remember and a German called Kirsty. Anna phoned her boyfriend and Kirsty asked where he is from. He's from Normandy, and there was some confusion, when Kirsty asked where that was I stupidly said, "you know, North France, where D-day happened". I think I got away with it. In addition Anna's Polish, so add us all together and we could recreate a fair bit of WW2. Now we share hotel rooms, we're like an advert for Benneton.

It's unclear whether we will even make it back tomorrow so we have an early start to give ourselves the best chance.

I've not had the best of luck with snow recently. John, Hannah and myself tried to go sledding but without a sled it proved difficult. First we used a mat from John's car until a young family took pity on us and let us have a go on their sleds. We tried to buy one, Toys'r'us had sold out so we tried to improvise with a part of a sand pit but it transpires they expect you to buy the whole hippo. In the end we settled for a snow man but after 10 seconds decided it was far too cold and we retreated in an orderly fashion to a harvester.

I'm seriously bored of snow

love love love x

A Desperate yet Sincere Cry for Help

I need your help.

I'm coming dangerously close to having to make a proper grown up decision. I know, I know. It revolves around what I'm doing in July. My contract finishes and I'm wondering what the devil to do next, could be more teaching, could be finding a proper job. This is where I need your help. Just how hard is it to find a job? I know I'll be looking in a few months, and with the exception of Emily, you obviously can't tell the future but any advice or wisdom would be appreciated whether it be email or facebook or whatever.

Hope to hear from you soon.

love love love x

8 Full Hours of Sleep

www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2010/jan/05/mr-bean-hacker-zapatero

It wouldn't happen to Brown.

How are you? I hope your new year was an orgy of alcohol fueled firework viewing and counting down. For the first time in years I actually made an effort for New Year. Sophie and Kelvin came down and we went to London town with Hannah, Sarah, Chris and John, fortunately the two sets of children played very well together. I have no idea when midnight actually was, we were outside Blackfriars train station but we got to see the fireworks, Hannah from John's back, before being hearded back down the street by horses with police man growing out of their backs.

The next day was spent mildly rocking, rocking like Keane or Scouting for Girls. Such was the performance on Rock Band. In fairness John and Catherine are good and Sophie is mean on the drums and Kelvin mastered the Bass, I was pretty terrible. Drumming isn't worth the scorn.

Since then Graeme Smith has batted me into submission all afternoon and Leeds have proved what we already know, League One is the new Premiership.

Return to proper blogging when I get back to Pamplona, assuming the snow allows it, fuck you snow, fuck you.

love love love x